Bad things happen....

Bad things happen.
That's it.
Bad things happen to good people, for reason I will never understand. The first blog I came to was about a young mother who had just lot her daughter to SIDS. It broke my heart reading about this perfect little family full of love for this little person that just passed away one day in her sleep. It spiraled from there and I started reading other BLM's blogs. I can't understand why some babies are born perfect and others and not. They all teach us something whether they are here for a lifetime or unfortunately for these parents a few short moments. All the women in these blogs are good people. They are all READY to have children only to have them snatched from them after too short a time. I became pregnant with my first daughter at 16 and didn't see a doctor until I was about 24 weeks pregnant and thank GOD my daughter was perfect. these women PLAN their children, plan their lives around these babies that they are ready for and some don't get the chance to even hold a living child. Why? Why does this happen. Why can an unprepared 16 year old have a perfect daughter and a woman who is ready cannot? I am thankful for the blessings GOD has granted in my life and I know that I am blessed but sometimes I don't feel deserving. When days are bad, I feel that the crap I've done is the reason for those bad times. I feel that I am being punished in the middle of being blessed. (if that makes any sense) But then I see what these women are dealing with and I ask God "Why them and not me?" I have done horrible things and still have my beautiful girls in my life. I live in a world of regret and sometimes I don't know how much longer I can do this.